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MONDAY JANUARY 22 2007
MONDAY JANUARY 22 2007
Iíve been a mom for a week.

That is just crazy.

I have not dropped him, but I have put a diaper on backward. Theo paid me back by urinating in my face. Thanks, dude. Anyway, here are some things Iíve learned so far:

Nateís ridiculous songs work wonders on cats and babies. After a longish bout of crying, little Theo shut his trap right quick once dada starting singing some nonsensical, off-key ditty about baby being handsome and cute and pretty and cute and handsome.

Baby swings rule. Theo will be in one till he goes to college.

Iím a weepy new mom. I look at him clamped to my boob and tear up. (Heís so perfect!) When burping, changing, bouncing, feeding, and swaddling donít make Theo happy, I tear up. (How the hell do you do this?!) When I send my husband out to buy me Tucks witch hazel pads, I tear up. (I have stitches in my lady business!) Naps seem to help keep the weepies at bay, however.

I canít tell time or count to 20 in the middle of the night. Iíll wake up at 3:35am to put Theo on a boob and ask Nate what time itíll be in 20 minutes (twenty per boob, remember). And weíll both stare at each other for way too long trying to figure it out. Iíve now resorted to bringing the kitchen timer into the nursery.

My abdomen and belly button are sore and squishy. Itís not quite fat squishy, just weird waterbed-like squishy. Theoís doc says Iím still swollen. Why did it never dawn on me that this would happen? After all, my organs were all jammed up to my chest for months.

Theodore is meant for even more awesomeness. We think that he was born still in the amniotic sac (aka born in caul). This happens in 1 in 1,000 births. And according to medieval peeps, this is a sign that the baby is destined for greatnessóand possibly psychic. Sweet!

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